Growing up

So apparently there is talk of a certain someone coming back today at 6:00 p.m. so I guess that leaves time for one more blog. You know I was just thinking today about how I think I've reached that point in my life where I find God cool. you know what point I'm talking about? I think everyone reaches that point in there life at some time (maybe not necessarily concerning God) ...normally when you move out of the house or go away to college. That point where you realize your parents are cool and what they used to say actually made a lot of sense. That they are actually very intelligent and have so much wisdom, and basically that they are just cool. Yeah I think I've reached that point with God. Because I'm learning so much about Him and realizing just how awesome he is. I reached this point with my parents a few years ago, I guess when I went to college. I realized how amazing my parents are, and how much wisdom they have. For example, I realized how awesome my parents are with money. When I was growing up, I used to think my family was poor. I mean we only shopped at the jockey lot and I only wore hand-me-downs from my cousins who had passed it down to 2 of my other cousins, then my sister, and then me. We never really had name brand stuff or the nicest cars or anything. so therefore when I saw other kids who bought clothes with the tags still on them, I just assumed that my family was poor. But here is the kicker, we used to go to Disneyworld almost every year of my childhood it seemed. We used to take trips all the time, and we have honestly taken at least two vacations a year since I was born. I've been able to go to other countries on mission trips, and lastly, My sister and I have both graduated college with ZERO debt (which is virtually impossible nowadays). I say this in no way to brag or boast (I know my parents probably wouldn't want me to say it, but when there is an opportunity to give glory to God Almighty for meeting our needs why not right? and to say that my parents have made smart choices with their money. they didn't use it to put on a show, but to make memories, and for this I am so grateful now. They have instilled this into my siblings and I. Now back to the whole God being cool thing. You know I realize as I learn more about God, that he really is so smart. You know most of the things (like commandments and laws and stuff) he said in the Bible are FOR us, not FOR him. So many times growing up, I thought he said all those things because the only way we could be good enough for him was to do them. It was like his way of showing us he was better than us or something. And just like the rules your parents give you, you think they are dumb. Until you reach a point where you realize that they did it cuz they love you. God had all of these things written down for us, because He wants us to have the best life imaginable. We were designed to live life with Him. And when we don't, things get messy. That's not how life was supposed to be lived. That's why he tells us not to sin. Because God is water and sin is oil. They just don't mix. We shouldn't not sin because we are afraid we will go to hell or because we want to be a witness to others (not that those are bad reasons), but they are like dieting so you can be skinny or so other people will find you attractive. Unless you diet to be healthy, it won't last and its probably unhealthy. We shouldn't sin because it separates us from God. So sin is essentially anything that keeps us from Him. That plain and simple. one last think and I'll shut my yapper. Lately I've been dealing with not having hard feelings toward someone that I feel did me wrong, that hurt me. I'm not really bitter, I'm just still dealing with wanting the best for that person. I've been praying that God would help me to fully forgive them and to heal my life. But then the other day, something happened. I just started praying FOR that person, instead of about them. And you know what, it was hard to have hard feelings for them when I was praying for them. And then that thing called a light bulb went off and I realized why God says, bless those that curse you and pray for you enemies. Because its about YOU not them. He knows that praying for them and blessing them is the way for you to get over them. Its not so you can be holy and righteous and "do the right thing." It's so you can be whole. And that is the life he wants for you. So that is my thought for today. It is awesome to realize that we really do mature in our relationship with Christ, just like we mature in life. Have any of you reached this point? would love to hear your thoughts. Peace, love, and pura vida.

Love

Yes, I have created a new blog, considering I think it is appropriate as I move into this thing called the "real world" or so everyone my entire life told me that's what it's called once you get out of college. So far things haven't been too different since becoming an alum, I've mainly just been working and writing the many many thank you notes for all of the amazing gifts I received (I'm just going to put a big THANK YOU here to everyone for all of your love and support that you showed during my graduation. It was just another reminder of how blessed I am to have all of you in my life). Well just in this past week, I already feel like God has revealed so much of himself to me. It's crazy. So I guess I want this blog to be more about the things I am learning about Him and people and just the "real world" in general vs the many awkward situations that arise in my life (although I am sure that there will be many of those to come and I will probably still share). So this morning I was reading in Exodus and I found this scripture in Exodus 34 that said, "Do not worship any other god, for the Lord whose name is Jealous, is a jealous God." Say what? I get the whole jealousy thing, as I have spoke on it before, but the whole "For the Lord whose name is Jealous" threw me way off. So in my study bible, I looked at the footnotes that some guys decided to write, and its said to see ex. 20:5. Wow, that was revolutionary. So I go to 20:5 and it was saying that jealousy is a part of the vocabulary of love. Isn't jealousy the green monster or something like that? It's actually part of the definition of love? So then I proceed to pull out our GINORMOUS (is that even a word? whatever you get the point) aka REALLY large two part dictionary to look up the definition of love. And this my friend is the point of the story. I was quite saddened by the many definitions The World Book Encyclopedia 1963 dictionary gave me. These are some of the definitions it gave for love, "1. a strong or passionate affection for a person of the opposite sex. 2. an instance of such a feeling (an instance, really? is that all love is) 3. This feeling as a subject for books or as a personified influence 4. A loved one (I hate when they use the word in the definition, that seems completely superfluous 5. fond or tender feeling; warm liking, affection; attatchement 6. strong liking. and last but certainly not least 7. something charming. Hmm does somethings seem a little off to anyone else here? So apparently love is just a feeling now or maybe that's how its always been. I was really shocked because now I see that the definitions I just listed really are the only definitions of love we have in our society. It's just a feeling, and when that feeling goes away, so does our commitment and faithfulness to that thing or person we once "loved". In the bible, it said love demands devotion (at least that's what it meant when it said jealousy is part of the vocab of Love) I'm not saying I really know the definition of love, but I am shocked that all my fears were true. That love is simply defined as a feeling, completely conditional on our emotions. That makes me sad. The other day I was talking to my grandma and I was asking her about how her relationship with my grandpa (like how they met, and how long they dated before they married and stuff like that) and you know she said something that blew me away because my grandma is like the sweetest person in the entire world and we normally don't have deep conversations I guess, "she was like, "It hasn't always been a bed of Roses (she said this two or three times so I'm guessing she was trying to make a point). You know, one time I was told him [my grandfather] that I was going to leave and he said (here's the kicker) 'Well if you leave, I'm going with you'. And then she said, "And I've been with him ever since." Man, my grandma is awesome. I'm pretty sure my grandmother didn't always "feel" like she was in love, but it was my grandfather's devotion that kept her there. hmm. that is a strange concept for my generation to understand, committment. I am the first to say I struggle with it, terrified of it, actually. But God has taught me that it's really all about devotion. That's why when things aren't going good, you can still worship Him. That's really all he requires of us. He's kind of taken care of the rest. anyway, those are just some thoughts from a college grad. I would love to hear any of your thoughts on the subject (If anyone is still reading these, if not its fine, I write because I like to, not really for anyone else). Peace. Love. and Pura Vida